Thanksgiving Potluck times 2 (or 4)

Tonight I held my Second Annual Pot Luck Thanksgiving Special and special it most certainly was. Technically speaking, it was the fourth potluck thanksgiving feast that I have coordinated, the first two during my last year of college and first year of grad school with the USF softball team. The tradition died once "my house" graduated but I rekindled the spirit 2 years ago with a quaint little gathering at my newly purchased house. Last year didn't work out quite as I has intended for it to and we cancelled it but this year we were back and better than ever. Twelve of my friends and family members (those terms can pretty much be interchangeable in my mind)came up/over to hang and eat some fabulous grub. We had so much food that I don't need to eat for at least a week but I have too many leftovers!! It's so amazing how quickly I can be transported back to high school or college and then transition so easily into last weekend. I love life and all of my friends. I'm so thankful for old friends and new and the traditions that we are slowly starting to build. Next tradition on tap; KNR's New Year's Snowboarding Adventures. (KD, Nate and Rachel - letters will be added as people join in our fun!!)

Dreams be Dreams

If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans. I'm fairly certain that I have given God more than a few good chuckles throughout my 28 years. Don't get me wrong, I love my life and my God and God has blessed me with most of the desires of my heart. But I remember as a child wanting so badly to be the first female quarterback for the University of Florida. And as I got a little older and realized that guys are WAY bigger than me, I wanted to play softball there, to stand on the football field at half time and be introduced, to be an All-American, to date a football player and walk out with him on Senior Day. I would go to med school, be married by 24, start having kids by 27. Saturday afternoons in the fall would be spent tailgating in Gainesville, a big family affair with food and TV's and playing catch and then watching the Gators destroy whoever decided to set foot in the Swamp that particular day. Or at the very least, playing football in the yard with the neighborhood kids. And yet here I am, 28, single, a USF grad who had a special place on the bench for their softball team, living in a townhouse in a community in which kids vandalize or play on patio furniture not intended to be played with instead of play football or baseball or hockey in the street. The friends that I do have don't live close and most of them are married. I keep praying for KD to have a kid so at least I'd have someone to play with soon!! So I sit, on the first cool day of the season, on my couch, by myself, watching football and writing ridiculous notes on the shortfalls of my dreams. Dreams be dreams, right? I wish the song was dreams be reality.

GAME DAY

IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN!!
Opening weekend of college football and I'm so pumped. High expectations for my Gators this year. Hopefully, as the old ball coach was famous for saying, "God will smile on the Gators" once again! Yay for Timmy T. :)


PS: Oklahoma lost to BYU and lost Sam Bradford to an AC joint separation. I hate when an injury changes the entire outcome of a game. Hopefully Sam will be back soon.

Skip to Malay

Two weeks ago, I returned from a 2 1/2 week basketball trip to Malaysia. Where? Malaysia!! Home to the largest air traffic control tower, the fourth tallest communications tower (which houses the highest McDonalds in the world) and the second tallest buildings in the world. And it is home to some wonderfully amazing people. A group of 7 of us, who pretty much met for the first time in Atlanta during training camp, left July 2 on a 13 hour plane flight to Toyko, followed by 7 hours to Singapore and another 70 minutes skip to Penang, Malaysia. We spent two weeks playing basketball, learning the culture, putting God only knows into our mouths, and making some amazing new friends. We went to a few home schools to share about American culture, play a little ping pong and badmittion (which we almost always lost at) and to talk a little about our beliefs. We experienced the most disguisting fruit in the world, the hottest sausage ever, fish nibbling at our feet and playing every game of basketball outdoors in a blanket of humidity. But more importantly, God used us to affect eternity. The guys especially had numerous opportunities to share and discuss religion and present the gospel as the truth and God as a loving Father. I know that what we were doing was not under the sun because Rodney reported back that this was the greatest response he has ever had to a basketball team. God used us to open doors, to plant seeds, to water the soil. I can not even begin to tell you what it feels like to be used by Him and to see even small glimpses of His hand at work. But God also did a work in me. We are, unintentionally I suppose, swayed to think that American culture has it right and that we are "superior," for lack of a better word, to others around the world. God opened my eyes and allowed me to see people as they are: people. Not skin color, not cultural differences, not language barriers. People - as they have the same happiness and the same struggles. People who are no different from me. He also allowed me to truly experience the old addage that God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. While everything around me changed; the atmosphere, the people, the time change - God remained the same. Whether I'm sitting on my couch watching jeopardy or playing basketball in Malaysia. Whether Abraham is putting his son on an altar or my great grandchildren (God willing) are playing in the front yard. He is the SAME! Constant - always. God continues to humble me by also showing me how small I am in the realm of the world. In the realm of history. I cannot save, I cannot reach everyone, I am but a miniscule blimp on the universe's historical radar. But I am significant. And I make a difference. But it's not about me, not even close. Gosh, I think I could go on forever about this trip. But for the sake of my fingers and your eyes, I will leave you with a few photos of our 'Skip to Malay."



See facebook for more pics!

Only the good die young

Shastin Brae Rader #23 12/19/85 - 6/17/09

I guess it's fitting that #23 would go at that very age. That's how we will all remember her. Smiling, shining, laughing, loving - number 2-3.

Shas, I've known you since you were 3 or 4, tagging along at the ball field right behind Zach, trying to catch up to me, Tatum and the rest of the 'older kids.' Shocked is the only word that can possibly describe the feeling I had when I found out. And devastated. But you are in a better place. We love you, we miss you, we are proud of you. Save a spot, preferably at short, for me in that big game in the sky.

So she knows she can dance!!

On Saturday, my sister Reagan had her final dance recital - maybe ever. Each year, the seniors get to perform a solo that they choreograph. I know she's my sister so I'm a little bias, but this kid can dance. I love her!!

A No-No!!!

Congratulations to Ashley Stubbs, a former player at Newsome now playing at Appalachian State, who threw a no-hitter in her third ever collegiate start. For those who aren't avid softball fans, that's the equivalent of hitting a hole in one on a par 4. It's an extremely impressive feat that most pitchers never even achieve in Little League and she's doing it in college. As a freshman! In her third start. What an accomplishment! I felt like a proud parent last night when I read the headline on goasu.com. Maybe that's strange but oh well, that's me. And not to go unnoticed - she was 5 for 7 at the plate on Sunday and is currently second on the team in batting average at .360! Once again Stubby, you are my hero! I truly hope that I will get to watch you play this season!

Just Kidding. . .

Just when I think things are looking up, God says "just kidding." So much for the 'perfect' small group - it was cancelled. So much for truly enjoying Big Brothers Big Sisters - my little doesn't have an athletic bone in his body and doesn't really like sports. I think I've got it all together - it all comes crashing down with one sentence. I think I've made a good friend, maybe with the potential of something more - he goes and gets a girlfriend and I lose the friend status too. Well maybe not the status but definitely the hanging out aspect. I'm sure God has a plan for all of this, for my life in general, and I know that I need to trust Him, but it's difficult. I know He's faithful. I know He's trustworthy. And I know He has more planned for me than I can even imagine. But it's difficult. I have issues. But I want my life to be like Kelly Clarkson's new song, in which she says "I know that I have issues, but your pretty messed up too. . .my life would suck without you." I just feel that everyone in my life leaves. My best friend isn't even my best friend anymore. I can't talk to her about things. She doesn't want to be that person for me anymore. And who can blame her. I know my life is not all bad and that this is just my way of venting so that it's out and doesn't have to eat at me anymore but I get tired of things seemingly going well and then having it come crashing down. Life's wonderful. . .just kidding.

All venting aside, my life really isn't that bad. But sometimes I feel miserable.

Small group time

I have been having some difficulties with different areas of my life, namely my singleness, my loneliness, my need to always be doing, helping, etc. Most of my concerns have stayed buried deep within my soul, partly because prior experience has taught me that divulging may not be the best idea and partly because 99.9% of my friends are married and don't really understand where I'm coming from. On my overwhelming need to get involved in everything, I went to one of the church's small groups last night that is geared for 18-30ish people. I was a bit petrified, as I know no one at the church at all. I truly thought that I was going to flake out and not end up going but I just felt pushed to go, despite or maybe in spite, of my insecurities. And once again God proved himself more than faithful. I met with a group of 4 singles, one of whom expressed almost every fear, thought and insecurity that had been plaguing my mind. And He decided to place on our hearts, well mainly Melissa's heart, to begin our study on the relationship of God - as Dad, as Father and as Daddy. That was and still is my biggest struggle in my relationship with God. And it's something that I know I need. God, as always, has led me in the direction that is best suited for my life. I truly need to thank Him and trust Him always.

Adven-cations and Revelations

Adven-cation - Josh Ross' word for the somewhat ridiculous, surely to be life-altering trip that my brother and these four clowns pictured with him have decided was a necessity. Or something. The five of them schemed, planned, saved and begged and then packed up life as they knew it into travel backpacks and left for a land 18 hours ahead of Palmetto, FL, although deceptively similar in appearance. With no date of return and no true plan of any sort, the guys began their island hop in Auckland, New Zealand. Check out www.aliquidworld.com for updates, photos and videos. It's sure to be a 'trip!'


Now to the revelations. First, I must preface with a "God is so good," a daily revelation that I need to remember and hold dear. Yesterday I outfitted my 6 CD changer with 6 Christian albums in an attempt to constantly renew my mind and stay in Christ. Today, while on random shuffle, Barlow Girl's True Love Waits anthem "Average Girl" blasted through my speakers. I have heard this song no less than 76 times since I bought the album 4 1/2 years ago. But today was the first time I actually "listened." The chorus goes a little something like this: (feel free to imagine me singing, just make sure I sound good!!)
No more dating,
I'm just waiting
Like Sleeping Beauty,
My Prince will come for me
No more dating, I'm just waiting
'cause God is writing my love story
As I look around at my friends getting married and having children while at the same time spending far too many reflective moments alone on my couch, my soul has developed an undeliable ache. I so long for that special someone in my life, to have and to hold, for better and for worse, in sickness and in health, to have children with, to play with my children, to teach them. Gosh, just talking about it makes me, aaauugghhh!! It's a constant struggle for me to wait, both spiritually and physically. And while I'm still a virgin, my mind has been far from pure. It's something that God is shoving in my face on a daily basis and for good reason. And this song was His pick-me-up-it's-going-to-be-ok-just-trust-Me revelation. Because God is writing my love story and His story is far more beautiful and amazing than anything my ridiculous mind could possibly conjure up. And I can conjure with the best! It gives me hope and I know that when I "get tired waiting 'til he comes, God's arms are the perfect place to run."